Saturday, November 26, 2011

Normally, I'd never read Henry James. But times are strange…

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Is it just me, or are there other people on this planet? That's really been bothering me lately…

Sunday, November 6, 2011

So the peanut crop falls short by 13%, and peanut butter immediately jumps nearly 200% in price. Latest version of an old story, but still…

Friday, November 4, 2011

When did determining the beginning of human life come within the province of popular vote?
How come no one gets down on their lousy, stinkin' knees and begs me to become a freemason?

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Anything described as "a done deal, just a few details to work out" is, in practical terms, doomed.

Monday, October 31, 2011

You can, for sound and sensible reasons, cancel Halloween events, but Halloween itself still happens…

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Facebook today is saying my account's unavailable due to a site issue. Oh, the humanity!

Sunday, October 23, 2011

I'm glad I don't live a PG-13 life. Keeping the f-bombs down to one every two hours would be very trying.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Today on Name That Suspicious White Powder, we have a standard business envelope, a priority mail envelope and a Gucci handbag…

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

First ever Apple purchase: a Mac IIci, upgraded to 5 (count 'em!) megabytes of RAM and a 250 megabyte hard disk. Sweet, sweet machine…
‎"My morals ain't shaky, they just hit turbulence a lot."

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Decision time: kelp, or freeze-dried halibut?

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Entertain me, world, or it's off with your head!

Monday, September 26, 2011

Sue and I have taken up Frisbee boxing. We didn't intend to, it just kinda happened…

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Thank you, thank you, it's good to be here. The emolument was most satisfactory…

Thursday, September 22, 2011

AMEN Sandwich Cookies…for when someone says to give 'em one.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

REM is calling it quits. The B-52s are on-again, off-again. C'mon, Athens, GA, what else you got?

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

My dream? To run the lip balm and hand lotion concession at a salt mine.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

I'd love to reinvent myself, but I simply can't decide on a color scheme.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

The latest pole dance craze…the TSA Grope-Search!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011


Wednesday, August 31, 2011

If we replaced our current crop of prominent politicians with reality show contestants, would we notice the difference?

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Never mind being carnivores, herbivores or omnivores…our big problem is being petrol-vores.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Qaddafi's new address: a secret (for now) compound in Pakistan.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Markets go up…markets go doooooown…